Diagnoses: Love
by Blue Skies Rusty
Summary: A fluffy story in which House and Chase may have found love in two lowly employees at the hospital. CoWritten with CosmicGirl22. HouseOC ChaseOC rated for language... and possibly other things
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **Right. So, CosmicGirl22 and I are back with another fic. Hopefully all you House fans will enjoy it. It's our first House fic so be gentle. Constructive criticism is always welcome and reviews in general are always wonderful. So, tell us what you think. : )

**Disclaimer: **We don't own House... but we're going to borrow the characters and have our ways with them!! MWHAHAHAH!!!

* * *

**Chapter One**

He stepped inside the gift shop narrowly avoiding Cuddy. House hid behind Hamilton, the pink pig and Petey, the pink flamingo and watched her through the window of the gift shop. She stopped and looked down the only two directions he could have gone. One direction led down another hallway towards radiology, the other direction led to a flight of stairs. Cuddy sighed and walked down the corridor towards radiology. House smiled smugly; he was free and clear, for the time being at least.

"Hello." House spun around. There was a young woman standing behind the counter. The look on her face made it obvious she was wondering what he was doing peeking out the window. "Can I help you find anything?" Her tone confirmed it.

"Yeah," he said thinking quickly to throw her off, "Where do you keep the alcohol, tobacco, and firearms?"

"This is a hospital," she began and he pursed his lips. This was partly why he rarely talked to people. Idiotic things came out of their mouths, as if he didn't know that this was a hospital. "Which means there's no smoking. Firearms--clean-up's too messy, and the alcohol, well, we reserve that for the really special customers You know, doctors and nurse."

House had to admit he was impressed, he almost told her that he was a doctor to call her bluff but then decided better of it. He wasn't in the mood to give free medical advice about her mother's bunions at the moment.

"In that case I guess I'll just have the gum," he said and threw a 35-cent pack of gum onto the counter and reached for his wallet.

"That's it?" she asked with her eyebrow raised.

"Was I supposed to buy something else?"

"That same pack of gum is a quarter on the third floor vending machine." she said.

"Ok? Is there a reason you don't want to sell me gum, or do you always tell your customers where to shop cheaper?"

"I'm just saying this is a gift shop and whoever you're here to visit would probably like something besides gum."

House reached over and picked up a nearby teddy bear. "Have you worked here long?" he asked as he threw it on the counter.

"No," she said and kind of shrugged her shoulders. "I've been here about a week. It's an ok job, just gets kind of lonely in here, no one ever really comes in."

House paid for his things and went to the door, doing a quick swipe of the lobby before exiting. He had a feeling he would start coming in more often. At least until Cuddy discovered his new hiding spot.

**

* * *

**

House absentmindedly set the teddy bear on the desk and began riffling through his drawer for his mini TV. Dr Wilson and Dr Chase entered House's office, clearly still in the conversation they were having in the corridor. House looked annoyed and tried to ignore them by turning up the volume on his soap.

"I'm just saying she's exhibiting signs of depression, we might want to take that into account." Chase was saying.

"I told her two days ago she had less than two months to live, she's allowed to be a little depressed." Wilson defended, but Chase's eyes were deflected towards the suspiciously red teddy bear on House's desk.

"That's new." he said. House winced realizing he should have gotten rid of it.

"Ooh, red," Wilson had followed Chase's eyes to the bear. "Supposedly the color of love. Someone sending you presents, House?"

"I'm busy." House said and inched the volume up higher.

"Let me guess, that elderly lady from a few months ago? The one that wrote the poem."

"Depression indicates a chemical imbalance, have you tried putting her on mood stabilizers?" House asked.

"You know if I didn't know you better, I would say you're trying to change the subject." Wilson laughed.

"Oh, you know me so well." House dismissed and grabbed his TV off his desk and stood up, grabbing his cane too.

"Mm..." Wilson shook his head. "By the way, Cuddy has been looking for you all morning. Something about clinic duty?" Chase slightly grinned.

"You certainly had no trouble finding me," he replied making his way back to the door. If Cuddy was looking for him this place was no longer safe.

"I know it's time for your beloved soap, and you had to come here for your TV." Wilson pointed to the object in House's hand.

"So, you're right." House said. "If you see her again tell her I'm in the cafeteria, or better yet the men's room." House then turned to Chase, who had picked up the bear from Houses desk, and was examining it. The price tag indicated it was clearly from the hospital's gift shop. "Give me that."

House snatched it out of Chase's hand and tossed it to Wilson who barely caught it. "Give it to one of your amazing bald midgets in the cancer ward. Excuse me."

Then he pushed past Wilson and headed off in the direction of the elevator. Wilson looked at Chase suspiciously. Not only had House offered something to a kid with cancer but he had also said excuse me.

* * *

"Chase." At the sound of his name, Dr. Chase stopped on his way out of House's office and turned around to see Foreman coming his way. "Are you heading to lunch?"

"Yeah," he replied in his Australian accent. "Why?"

"I have a patient that can't wait but this needs to get to filing." At this, Foreman held up one of the maroon files. "Think you can drop it off on your way to the cafeteria?"

"Sure thing." Chase reached out and took the file. Foreman called a thank you over his shoulder as he walked briskly in the other direction.

As he walked down the hall, Chase flipped through the file. It was nothing special. Just a mother of three complaining about constant migraines. All the tests had come back clean so Foreman had written it off as stress.

Rounding the corner, he walked up to the rectangular window, which looked into the filing room. It was a large room with shelves adjacent to the window, stacked to bursting with files. Under the window was a small desk with a computer, printer, tabletop shredder and a phone.

Normally an elderly woman sat at the desk but as Chase leaned on the counter, he saw no one.

"Hello?" He called into the seemingly empty room.

"Just a second," a voice called back. Whoever the woman was, she didn't sound old. Probably a temp or something.

There was a _THUNK!_ followed closely by an "OW!" Slightly curious, Chase looked to one of the end aisles to see a young woman appear, shaking her hand. Her knuckles were red, probably from accidentally hitting her hand on a shelf. Her other arm was full of files.

"What do you need?" She asked as she dropped the stack on the desk next to the shredder.

"Just dropping off a file." Chase held it up and handed it to her over the counter.

As she took the file she rolled her green eyes. "Gee, thanks," she muttered. "Another one." She tossed it onto the desk into a pile he hadn't seen yet.

With his brows furrowed slightly, Chase asked, "I'm sorry?"

She looked up at him. "Let me ask you something. Did you people have a dyslexic ape working in here before me because, I've seen toddlers who could do a better job organizing."

"I didn't know there was anything wrong with it." As he spoke, Chase looked from the woman to the shelves and back again.

"Wrong with it?" She scoffed. "There are files in here that are over twenty years old and should have been shredded long ago. I've found 'R' names under 'L'. This place is a disaster."

"Well, it shouldn't take too long to fix, right?" Chase had no idea how offices worked. He'd never had to do anything remotely secretarial in his life.

She looked up at him with despair. "I've been working her for two weeks."

His blue eyes widened slightly. "Oh."

They stood in silence for a moment, neither really knowing what to say.

"I'm Tess, by the way." She offered him her hand a weary smile.

"Dr. Chase," he replied, shaking her hand.

"I better get back to work," she said, looking at the mess of files on her desk. "It was nice meeting you."

"Yeah," he replied, smiling slightly. "You too."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: **Thanks so, so much to Mikesh for our first ever review on this story! Much love to you. CosmicGirl22 thought it would be a good idea to let you all know that the part of Drew is being played Drew Fuller... or a look alike. Whichever is more believable.

**Disclaimer:** We don't own anything related to House but we're certainly going borrow a few of the characters. Hehehe. Hahaha.

* * *

**Chapter Two**

House walked back into the gift shop, and ignoring the girl behind the counter, set up his TV on the magazine rack and turned it back onto his show. He propped himself up against the wall beside the magazine rack and sighed, thankful he'd only missed about fifteen minutes. The girl looked at him and almost said something, but then the door chime rang again.

"Can you show me your selection of flowers?" the robust man said as he came in. "My wife is having her tubes tied. I want to get her something pretty. She likes roses."

"Alright, they're right over here." Elise smiled and showed him her small display of fresh flowers. They were delivered bi-weekly from the local flower shop. The gift shop itself was small. With all the knick knacks placed around, it felt more like a walk in closet than a room, especially with three people in it.

"Looks like the only roses we have right now are pink or yellow." she said showing him the first two sets of flowers on the rack.

"I don't know..." the man looked at the price tag and stalled. "Aren't you supposed to get girls red roses?"

"Red is the norm for romance, because it means love, but pink signifies admiration and sympathy which is sort of fitting for your wife's circumstances, don't you think?"

"I think I'd really rather go with red."

"Ok, well we do have some red carnations. Carnations mean devoted love." she moved back to show him some other

"These look kind of wilted." he grumped.

"Actually we're supposed to get another shipment tomorrow."

"No good." the man sighed. "She goes home tomorrow. You're sure you don't have any red roses at all?"

"Oh my god, would you shut up!" It was House from the corner of the room. "She's already told you she doesn't have any. Do you think if you keep arguing with her she's going to amazingly pull some out of her ass?"

The man looked like he had been slapped across the face. He kept looking from Elise to House and back again. He had a '_you're going to let him talk to me that way_' look on his face. Elise only shrugged.

"I'll order her flowers from a flower shop. They'll probably be cheaper anyway." he said finally and stormed out.

"Was that your way of helping me?" Elise said after a brief pause. "because you kind of just cost me a sale."

"It was my way of getting him to shut up so I could listen to this." House said, not looking back at her. "Besides he wasn't going to buy any of those anyway."

"Yeah, he was." she persisted. "All I had to do was reassure him I didn't have any red roses, then he would've tried to talk me down on the price. I would've thrown in the card for free and he would've bought the pink roses."

"I thought you said you hadn't worked here long?" House turned and raised his eyebrow.

"I haven't worked _here_ long, but I've been in retail for a long enough to know when I've sold someone."

"Sorry, won't happen again." he said in the most insincere tone he could muster. She was about to throw him out when he winced at a pain in his leg. He fished into his pocket and pulled out some pills and chomped down on one. She felt sort of bad, he was a customer too and she didn't have any right to bawl him out. She walked over behind her counter and grabbed her stool.

"Here." she said and slid it over to him. He was about to slide it back to her, but then something about the look on her face made him reconsider. He stuck his cane on the rack behind him and sat down on the stool, and went back to watching his show.

**

* * *

**

"Well, I'm glad that one's done with," Foreman sighed. "I'll drop the file off and then I'm taking my break."

"No, I'll do it," Chase volunteered, showing his first sign of interest in the conversation.

"I thought you had a patient in ICU," questioned Cameron.

"I do," the Aussie agreed. "I also need am old file on a man who came in today."

"Alright." Foreman handed Chase the file, looking a little baffled.

Taking the file, Chase walked out of the room and left his fellow doctors to look at each other with confusion. He walked briskly down the corridors until he came around the corner to the file room. Then he stopped for a brief moment.

There was Tess standing at the window, laughing. Her head was tilted back, her eyes closed, and her brown hair hanging loose around her shoulders. "You are ridiculous," she said to the young intern that stood with his back to Chase, leaning casually against the counter. "Just give me the file." She held her hand out expectantly but the young man pulled the maroon file back and laughed.

"Not until you tell me your name," he said smoothly.

"Cher," she replied, jokingly. "Now, give me that."

He laughed at her joke. "Your_ real_ name."

For a moment she narrowed her eyes at him in mock anger and placed her hands on her hips. "Tess."

"A beautiful name for a beautiful woman," he said as he handed her the file.

Tess rolled her eyes and scoffed but she still smiled at the compliment. "Now, get out of here and let me do my job before we both get in trouble."

"But I haven't told you my name, yet," he whined, only half joking.

"It's Andrew." Tess pointed to his nametag. "Now scram! I have files to... file."

"Drew," he corrected as he backed away slowly. "And I think this is going to be my new favorite place." Tess merely laughed and shook her head as she returned to the files on her desk.

Once the intern, Drew, had gone, Chase continued his way up to the window. He watched as the young man walked off with a smirk and a twinkle in his blue eyes. Chase took an instant disliking to him.

"Hello," he said to Tess, still looking where Drew had walked off.

"Hi." He turned to see her smiling at him. "I didn't expect to see you back here again."

"Why's that," he asked, brow furrowed.

Her smile widened. "Most doctors have nurses or interns drop off their files."

"Well, maybe I'm not most doctors," he shot back.

Tess chuckled. "What do you need?"

"I need a file for a Mr. Thomas Dorian," he said, forgetting about the file he held in his hand.

"Dorian, Thomas," she repeated as she moved off to a shelf labeled "A-F" There was a brief silence as she searched for the file before she reappeared with it in her hand. "Thomas Dorian, DOB 4/27/79?"

"That's the one," he replied, taking it as she handed it to him over the counter. "Did you finally get that place cleaned up?"

"Enough to make a prudish librarian proud. It actually wasn't as bad as I made it sound. I just like to complain." They shared a smile at her joke.

Chase opened his mouth to compliment her, just as her phone rang. "Just a second." Reaching down she picked up the receiver. "Filing, how may I help you?" A pause. It was the Churchill Memorial Hospital in the next town over. "Francesca Jenks? How long ago did she say she was here? ...Uh-huh. Let me check the computer." She sat down and began typing away quickly.

Chase looked around and noticed a stack of sticky post-its on her desk. They were just in his reach and on an impulse he ripped one off and stuck it inside the file he held. Taking the pen from his pocket, he scrawled a quick note before closing it. Tess looked up at him and he pointed over his shoulder to signal that he was leaving. She nodded and returned to her mad search for Francesca Jenks's data.

As she waited for a page to load, Tess reached up to the counter and picked up the file Chase had left. Out of curiosity and boredom, she flipped it open. A small smile spread across her lips and she glanced up to see if he was still there but he was long gone.

Still smiling down at the little note, Tess was pulled out of her thoughts by the filing clerk on the other end of the line. "Are you still there," she asked waspishly.

"Yes." Tess turned back to her computer, still smiling. "Yes, I'm still here." No matter how hard she tried she couldn't forget the little note.

_Your hair looks nice today._

* * *

Elise sat looking at her plate of hospital lasagna and sighed. The job wasn't too bad but the food sucked. She made a mental note to start bringing her own lunch. Her mind kept going back to that guy from the gift shop. After his show was over he had turned off the TV, bought another bear and thanked her for letting him use her stool. She shrugged it off and was making designs out of her green beans when Tess plopped her tray down beside her.

"Don't even think about it." Tess said when she noticed Elise was eyeing her chocolate cake.

"Probably too dry anyway." Elise shrugged and took a forced bite of green beans. "So, how has your morning been?"

"Busy." Tess said between her first few rushed bites. "Honestly, whoever ran my section before me must've been blind or senile. Or both. We've been here for two weeks and I've only just gotten the place cleaned up." She took a bite of her cake and grimaced. "Tastes like Jenny Craig."

"And I thought my day had been bad, helping little Sally pick out just the right color of balloon for her big brave trip to the big scary hospital. You'll never believe this one weird guy that keeps coming into the shop. He watches his TV show then buys a bear and leaves."

"You have no idea how hectic it is up there, " Tess sighed, "but it has its perks."

"Perks?" Elise's eyebrow raised.

"Well, there are some pretty nice looking doctors that drop by." She grinned

"You're kidding me!"

Tess shook her head. "Nope, and I think one of them is _finding_ files to bring to me."

"So basically I'm stuck in a broom closet while you're having fun at 'Club _MED_'."

"Yeah," Tess grinned, slightly enjoying her friend's jealousy. "He's this really hot Australian guy, and then there's this other one who is an intern in surgery, Drew _something_."

"No fair! You get to hobnob with hot, young, rich doctors all day, while I'm stuck with teddy bears and some guy that's using the gift shop as his personal lounge."

"Don't be that way!" Tess grinned. "When we get home we'll watch a movie so we can both ogle hot guys."

"Hello, ladies." Tess and Elise looked up to see Dr. Cuddy standing above them. "How are your first few weeks going?"

"Great." Elise plastered a smile on her face and hoped to God her boss hadn't heard her complaining about her job.

"Now that I've got most of the filing sorted, its getting better." Tess half laughed.

"Oh, I know." Cuddy said with a sympathetic nod. "Mrs. Regina was a sweet woman, but I think she had lost it a bit there at the end, but its good to see you two settling in. Now, I don't have time to chat but if you need anything you know where my office is. Now, to go find Dr. House." Cuddy said more to herself than to them and headed off in the direction of diagnostics.

"Hmm... Dr. House." Tess said slightly interested. "A lot of the staff say he's a real asshole."

"I suppose most doctors are." Elise said absentmindedly then upon seeing the look on Tess's face. "Except the really hot Aussie, and intern ones of course." Tess smiled, and continued eating.

"Well, I guess Ill go back into my closet and stare at the kitty poster that says '_Hang In There_' for another four hours," Elise picked up her tray. "See you later. I get to pick the movie."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: **A warm thank you to all our wonderful reviewers. You're all too kind. If you think the story is cute and sweet so far, you're probably going to go into sugar shock before the end.

**Disclaimer: **CosmicGirl22 and I don't own House or anything else related to the show. We're just holding a few of the characters captive. Oh. And we obviously don't own sex-men... er... X-men hehehe.

* * *

**Chapter Three**

The two women sat on their living room couch with a bowl of popcorn between them. They were staring intently at the television screen, watching _X-Men 3: The Last Stand_.

"You know," Tess said slowly, reaching into the bowl for another handful of popcorn. "This movie just isn't doing it for me."

"Yeah?" Elise asked without taking her eyes off the image of Wolverine. "Why's that?

"There are a lot more doctors at work that more fun to look at." Tess looked over to her roommate and best friend.

Snorting, Elise replied. "Whatever. I'm sure they're all Greek Gods in scrubs."

Nodding Tess said, "Yeah. They look just like doctors do on TV. Their clothes tearing at the seams because have they have more muscle than brain."

Tess's comment about television doctor's jogged Elise's memory. "That guy keeps coming in," she said, glancing away from the movie and looking at Tess. "He's always watching one of those hospital soap operas."

"With the doctors?" Tess turned to face her friend as Elise nodded. "What's this guy like, anyway?"

Elise shrugged. "He's kinda older. I think he's in his late forties."

"Ooh, an _older _man," Tess teased, earning an elbow in the ribs.

Elise turned back to the TV and crossed her arms with a mock pout. "You're mean."

Suppressing her laughter, Tess turned and stared intently at Hugh Jackman as he sliced someone in half. "Shhh," she said, waving her hand at Elise. "His muscles are speaking to me." With a glance at her now smiling friend, Tess continued. "They're saying 'Elise needs a date'."

"Yeah, okay Ms. Chleo," she scoffed. As Tess's laughter quieted down, her mind returned the man in the gift shop. _He's not really _that _crazy..._ she was pulled out of her thoughts by Tess talking.

"The Aussie and the intern keep coming back, too," she said with an excited grin.

"Oh, I think Wolverin's muscles are saying 'Tess needs a date with Crocodile Dundee,'" she said, laughing.

Tess laughed and brushed her friend's comment off. "He keeps leaving me little notes in the files he drops off."

Now Elise was interested. "Really? I bet he asks if you want to play with his didgeridoo."

"Shut up," laughed Tess. Leaning over the edge of the couch she grabbed her purse and took out three little sticky post-its. "Here. Read them."

Taking them, Elise skimmed over them. _Your hair looks nice today _and _I like hearing you laugh _and _You have beautiful eyes_ were scrawled out on the little pieces of yellow paper. Elise grinned as she handed them back.

"That's so cute," she crooned. "The post-its are a little weird but still. Awww!! He's like a middle school boy!" Tess was laughing as she put the notes away again. It didn't matter if Elise teased her about the post-its. She thought it was sweet.

"So does this Aussie have a name or should I just call him the Post-It Bandit," Elise asked, teasingly.

Smiling, Tess replied. "His name is Dr. Chase."

**

* * *

**

It was 3 pm and he sat by the magazine rack as he had done every day for a week, each time watching the show and each time buying a bear after it was over. The last time he had came in she had asked his name as she was handing him his change. She wasn't sure why. She told herself it was only right to know the name of someone you're spending so much time with.

He seemed to think for a moment before muttering "Greg," and walking out. She was at least thankful she had a name to put with the face.

Elise couldn't help but grimace as the show's theme music started. She had no idea there were grown men in the world who watched that drivel. It seemed such a waste of time. In the week that he had been coming in, they were still trying to find out whether or not the pretty young nurse had been having an affair with the handsome doctor, and there looked to be no end in sight. She continued to dust and try to ignore the horrible acting.

"Demitri, if only I had known you would get in that car wreck…I never would've let you drive." the girl on the TV said dramatically and Elise tried to catch a quick peek at the screen in the small mirror she was cleaning. She didn't see the screen, but what she did see was Greg watching her as she was dusting. She practically dropped the mirror, but then swallowed hard. _"It's just your imagination, Elise, get over it." _She turned around to see if he was still looking at her, he wasn't. His eyes were back on the screen.

"Ever since I saw you in the ER I knew you were the one for me." The blonde girl said to some handsome guy in a lab coat, his muscles barely fitting into the sleeves. Elise couldn't hold it in, she had to snort.

"You have a problem with Susan here pouring her heart out?" Greg asked. He sounded curious.

"Oh, please." Elise said and stepped down off the step stool. "These lines sound like they were written by prepubescent teenage girls."

"Her husband died in the ER and she fell in love with his doctor," he said "It happens more often than you would think."

"Uh huh." Elise walked over behind him and folded her arms. "Well I suppose if real life doctors had muscles like that, it might happen more often."

"You into muscles?" he asked scrunching his brow and half turning to look up at her.

"Not really," she shook her head. "You?"

"No." he said, un-scrunching, and went back to the show.

"So, how did her husband die?" she asked, not that she was curious she just sort of liked the sound of his voice, and sort of liked being that close to him.

"He was poisoned." Greg sighed. "By the doctor."

"Ok, now I know it's prepubescent teenage girls."

"Don't you have dusting to do?" Greg said grumpily.

"Actually, yes." Elise smiled. "Let me just get past you here." She touched his shoulder and reached past him to grab some knick knacks behind him. He stiffened under her touch, and jerked away a bit. "I--I'm sorry." '_Damnit, Elise you hurt him'. _she thought to herself.

"It's fine," he said quickly and firmly, but seemed to draw himself back from her. He focused back heavily into his show.

Elise backed away. She felt like crap. Why did she do that? '_You don't just go touching people you don't know.'_ She went back behind the counter and tried to pretend the last ten seconds hadn't happened. The door chimed and Elise thanked God. It was a doctor, she could tell by the lab coat. "Can I help--?" she was cut off abruptly by him speaking over her.

"I had a feeling you would be here." he said to Greg. Elise put two and two together, the Australian accent and lab coat, could this be the post-it bandit in the flesh?

"You knew about my weakness for pens with cute little puppies on them?" Greg asked.

"The bears." The doctor said proud of himself. "they had the hospital's gift shop tags on them."

"Dr. Chase, I'm impressed." he smiled more to himself.

_Yep, definitely the post-it bandit_. Elise shook her head, her roommate was a lucky girl.

"There's some _things _we need to discuss." Chase looked over his shoulder at Elise. "Upstairs."

"Sounds serious." Greg got up and grabbed his cane and TV.

"It is." Chase wasn't happy being put on 'find House' duty.

"Better go then." House slid the stool back as he did everyday when he was done with it. "Bye," he said to Elise as he pushed past Chase and left. Chase was following after him when Elise stopped him.

"Dr. Chase?"

"Yes?" he was clearly annoyed.

"Just to let you know, we have some post-its with little hearts on them. Might give you an edge." she smirked.

"How did you…?" Chase managed after picking his chin up off the floor.

"Tessie and I are good friends." she grinned. "And she loves red carnations."

"She does?" he asked, sounding interested as he eyed the flower display. Then he remembered House and why he was in the gift shop to begin with. "You didn't tell him, did you?" his hand pointed where Greg had just exited.

"No, why would I?" she asked, confused.

"Thank God," he said then seemed to snap out of it. "Look, I've got to go." Then he rushed out just in time to catch the elevator House was on.

"So what did she say about me?" House said once the doors had closed.

"Who?" Chase asked.

"Gift shop girl, DUH!" House shook his head for emphasis. "She obviously stopped you to pump you for information about me."

"No, she didn't." he said.

"So she was talking to you about something not related to me." House asked slowly.

"Yeah." Chase's eyes narrowed.

"I don't believe you." House looked up at the ceiling.

"Believe what you want" Chase shrugged it off, but then thought for a second. "Do you… fancy her?" The look on his face showed that even he thought it sounded preposterous.

"God, you British people are so nosey." House scolded. Chase just rolled his eyes

* * *

With another stack of files doomed to be entered into the computer and then shredded, Tess came out from the shelves and dropped them on her desk. Looking up at the counter she saw a few files sitting in a pile from nurses that couldn't be bothered to stop, chat, or make sure she even _got_ the files.

Another file sat off to the side and Tess reached over and plucked up the single red carnation which sat atop it. She brought it up to her face and inhaled the sweet scent. She loved carnations. Wrinkling her brow, Tess leaned over and picked up the file to see if there was any indication of who had left it.

Stuck onto the maroon folder was a little yellow sticky post-it with her name on it. She smiled broadly. There was no doubt in her mind, the carnation had come from Dr. Chase.

* * *

House stood in front of the gift shop and tried the door knob. It was locked, same as it had been the last two times he tried it. He checked his watch again it was 3:20.

Elise got out of the elevator and stopped when she saw him standing there. '_I could make a run for it'_, she thought, but it was too late, he had spotted her.

"Hey!" he yelled to her across the hall. "Where have you been?"

"I had to pee." she said as she approached. "You could've read the note."

"You didn't know you had to pee at 2:30?" he questioned as she unlocked the gift shop door and walked past him.

"I had a customer in here until 2:56." she grabbed the "Be Back In 15" sign from the door and switched on the lights.

"It doesn't take twenty minutes to pee." he followed her in.

"I went ahead and took my break." she couldn't believe how upset he was, as if he couldn't find somewhere else to watch his show. Unless there was some other reason he liked coming in here.

"From now on 3pm is General Hospital time, use the rest of the day to grab a Twinkie and relieve your bladder. 3pm is…" his voice trailed off.

"What? _Our time_?? Do we having a standing date, you, me, Susan and Demitri?" she raised her eyebrows.

"No, a date would be like this… Tomorrow night, 7pm, wear something _festive_. This is…"

"I accept." she cut him off.

"You what?"

"I'm free tomorrow night." she replied. "I don't know about festive, but I have a black dress that goes with any occasion. I live on 12 walnut, apartment 36." She jotted it down on the back of the gift shops business card and handed it to him. "Oh, and this one's on me." she said and tossed him a blue bear from her bag. He caught it effortlessly and then he left, stunned but by the time he got back to the elevator he was grinning. _You still got it, House. You still got it_.

**

* * *

**

With the phone cradled to her ear and being held in place by her shoulder, Tess shuffled through a few of the folders. "Yes. I have it right here." She looked up and she tried desperately to suppress a smile. "I'll bring it up to him myself," she said, turning her attention away from the approaching Dr. Chase and back to the nurse from the fourth floor nurses' station. "Bye."

"Hello," Chase greeted with a smile. His eyes landed on the carnation which Tess had put into an old coffee cup filled with water. "A coffee cup?"

"I couldn't find a vase," Tess said innocently, causing him to chuckle. "Thank you. It's beautiful." She was admiring the beautiful red flower but looked back up to him. "How did you know they're my favorite?"

"Aussie mind-reading abilities ," he replied, feigning seriousness.

"Ohh." Tess nodded her head in understanding. "Like Jedi mind tricks but without being a Jedi. I get it."

"Yeah," he agreed. "I could basically get you to do anything I want."

Tess couldn't help but grin. "Prove it."

For a moment Chase looked like he didn't know what to do. Looking down at the post-its he asked, "Can I borrow that?" A little confused, Tess handed him the stack and he scribbled something on the top post-it before handing it back to her.

_Dinner _

_Friday _

_7pm_

Looking down at the little note made Tess grin like a madwoman. Suppressing her urge to smile until the cows came home, she put on a look of mock awe and gazed up at Chase with admiration. "Wow," she breathed. "You really _do_ have Aussie mind tricks. I find myself unable to say no."

They shared a laugh and Tess jotted down her address for him. "See you tomorrow, Master Aussie," she teased as he walked away.

**

* * *

**

Wilson walked into House's office and was surprised to hear House was listening to 'I'm a Believer' by the Monkees. "That's light for you." he commented.

"I've got a crush on Davy Jones." House replied. He was loading up his knapsack to take home. Tonight was the big night, the date with a girl half his age. It's not like it hadn't happened before but the last time had been against his will. This time he had consented freely, which meant if it was bad it was kind of his fault.

"So, you want to hang out tonight?" Wilson asked as he picked up the new blue bear on House's desk.

"I've got plans." he said.

"Plans. Yeah." Wilson sighed. "Taking a few extra Vicodin, playing the piano morosely, then crashing on your couch does not qualify as plans."

"I've got a date." House snatched the blue bear out of Wilson's hands.

"With who? Davy Jones?" Wilson looked stunned.

"I wish!" House said with mock enthusiasm but then sighed slightly and mumbled "Gift shop girl." House crammed the blue bear into his knapsack.

"So that's where these bears have been coming from." Wilson smiled, but then his smile turned into a frown. "Wait a minute. I've seen the girl who works in the gift shop. She's what, twenty five?"

"Her name's Elise. At least that's what it says on her name tag. And it's just a date." House said as he zipped up his bag and flung it over his shoulder.

**

* * *

**

As she came off the elevator, on her way back from delivering a file, Tess was still smiling. Today was Friday and she had a date.

She laughed quietly to herself and rolled her eyes when she rounded the corner to find Drew hovering near her work space. He turned around when she walked by and smiled widely at her. She shook her head again and went around another corner to the door that led into her oversized filing cabinet. Sitting down at her desk, she folded her hands primly and looked up at the smiling Drew.

"Yes," she asked her best secretary voice.

"It's about time," he sighed, though clearly not annoyed. "I've been waiting here for almost ten minutes."

"I've only been gone five," she pointed out.

"Every moment seems like eternity when I'm not with you." Tess had to laugh. It was such a cheesy line and he was actually at least somewhat serious about it.

"What do you need today," she asked.

"I have another file for you, fair lady." He gave a slight bow and flourished the file in his left hand.

Tess pursed her lips and narrowed her eyes. "And what question shall I have to answer today?"

"I have two for you." As he spoke, Drew leaned his right elbow on the counter and held the file behind his back.

"Ooh. Stepping it up," Tess joked. "Well, fire away."

"Okay. First question," he began. "Who gave you the flower?"

"A man. Why?" Tess leaned forward a little. "Are you jealous?"

"Tsk! Tsk," scolded Drew. "I'm asking the questions here."

Tess nearly choked on her laughter. "Okay. Sorry to spoil your fun." Straightening up and clearling her throat she said, "Continue, if you will."

"My second question," he began with a wary glance at the carnation. It was clear he felt threatened by whomever had given it to her. "What are you doing tonight?"

Grinning Tess replied, "I have plans."

"With me," he replied enthusiastically. "Perfect. I know a great little Italian place on Main street. Then I was thinking maybe we could--"

"I mean I have a date," she interrupted. "With someone else."

Drew's face fell and he glanced at the carnation as if it were the culprit. "Who is he?"

Tess sighed. "Dr. Chase. He's the intesivist on Dr. House's team."

For a moment Drew searched his memory for anything he knew about Dr. Chase. He pulled a face. "The Australian guy?"

"Yes." Tess nodded.

"What's he going to do," Drew asked, clearly miffed. "Take you to the zoo to see the crocs and the kangaroos?"

"We're going on a regular date like regular people do because he's a regular guy," she said, getting a little annoyed. "Just because he's Australian doesn't mean he's Steve Irwin."

For a long moment Drew was quiet. "Is it anything serious?"

"It's just one date. Nothing to get your panties in a twist about." laughed Tess. "And that was way more than two questions. File please." she held her hand out for the folder.

"Alright," Drew said, nodding. "Have fun tonight. Let me know how it goes." Then he paused and leaned over the counter and whispered, "Don't tell anyone else about my panties!"

He hurried off to leave Tess laughing in the filing room.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N:** Back by popular demand, for one chapter only, Diagnosis Love. This was actually written ages ago and will probably be the last chapter you'll see on this story for a _very_ long while. Sorry folks.

Elise stared into the mirror making sure 'the twins' were situated right in her dress, and that her makeup had no streaks. She wasn't one to really primp but this was important. She tried looking at the back of her head with two mirrors and didn't see any huge lumps in her dark brown hair so she was satisfied.

"Can I squeeze in here a minute?" Tess said and saddled up next to Elise. "I have a date tonight too you know."

"Yeah, sure." Elise backed away and disappeared into her room. "I'm almost done anyway, just got to grab shoes." she called back.

"You might want to wear something easy to move in, he might take you dancing." Tess said as she put on her last green earring that perfectly matched her dark green blouse.

"Uh, dancing's pretty much out of the question, so I suppose I can wear heels. He's tall so Ill need the extra height." she said coming back in. "One thing I didn't tell you about Greg, he's got a slight disability." she sat down on the toilet and started fastening the buckle on the side.

"Well, don't stop there…" Tess turned around. "What is it? Is he blind…in a wheel chair?"

"Nothing that major." Elise grinned. "He just has a slight limp. He has to walk with a cane."

"Oh…thank goodness you had me worried a secon…" Tess stopped mid sentence. "Wait a minute…."

"What?" Elise looked up at her friend.

"He's tall, hangs around the hospital, walks with a cane, and he's named Greg…as in Gregory?" Tess said slowly.

"Oh God." Elise said reading the look on her face. "He's a psych patient, isn't he?"

"He's not a psych patient. He probably should be though." This was just to good to be true, her roommate had managed to land a date with House.

"I'm not following." Elise looked ill.

"He's DR. Gregory House, the head of the diagnostics department."

"The guy everyone hates?" she remembered their conversation from a few days before.

"That's who it sounds like."

"That's not possible…" Elise started but was interrupted by the doorbell. "Ohmigod that's him!" she jumped up.

Elise opened the door , Greg was standing there leaning on his cane. "Hi!" she said sounding happy and relieved at the same time.

"Hi." he echoed and handed her a small bundle of flowers. One purple rose surrounded by a few other small yellow ones.

"Oh wow you didn't have to do this…" she said.

"I almost didn't. Its a lot harder buying flowers for people who actually sell them."

"So, you researched color meanings on the net before heading to the floral shop?" she laughed, his slight eye roll told her she had guessed right. "Well, come on in and Ill put these in some water." Elise left for the kitchen.

House peered into the room, as though slightly unsure about entering the female dwelling, alone and unsupervised. In the corner, he spotted a piano, nothing too fancy but a piano just the same. Leaving the front door open, just in case he needed an emergency exit, he casually limped over to it, checking out the photos on the wall as he went. He sat down in front of it, and began fingering a few keys. The piano was so out of tune it sounded slightly like a dying cat. Elise stuck her head out of the kitchen in time to see Greg grimace.

"Are you serious?" he snapped at her.

"No one here actually plays." she shrugged. "I got it when my grandmother passed away."

"Is her body still inside it?" he asked incredulously.

"Actually, no…" Elise started but was cut off by a knock on the door frame. She looked over to see Dr. Chase standing there holding about 8 red carnations.

"Is Tess here?" he asked . House looked up from the piano the second he heard the Aussie's accent, but Chase hadn't noticed him yet.

"One sec…" Elise was disappointed her conversation with Greg had been interrupted.

"Tess! Your male stripper has arrived!"

Tess entered and walked right over to Chase, but not before giving Elise a '_you'll regret that'_ look.

"Here, these are for you." he said with a smile and handed her the bouquet.

"Aww. They're awesome." she grinned ear to ear. "Ill go put these in water, make yourself at home. That's Elise and I think you know Dr. House."

Chase's face fell, as he slowly turned around to see Dr. House sitting at the piano staring back at him.

"Yes. We've met." House deadpanned.

"I have an idea…" Elise said once Tess had reentered the room. "Why don't we double date?"

"No." Greg and Chase said in unison.

* * *

The tension could've been cut with a knife. House sat trying his best not to make much eye contact with anyone, his tie itched his neck, and his subordinate being there put a damper on him trying to be flirty with his date. The waiter approached grinning ear to ear and said in very limited English "What you like?" House snatched up the sushi menu and proceeded to order about 90 dollars worth of sushi…in Japanese. Tess's mouth dropped open, as did Elise's. Chase seemed to be non-plussed, he'd heard him talk in other languages before. Elise scooted a little closer to Greg.

"This stuff is raw. Do you have any idea what can happen to you when you ingest raw fish?" Chase had to stop himself from rattling off a list of possible outcomes that included but was not limited to mercury poisoning and tapeworms.

"Not all sushi is raw." Tess comforted. "You can have the smoked salmon roll." Chase didn't seem too relieved.

Tess and Elise tried a few times to start up a conversation but to no avail. House and Chase just sat there on the verge of seething at each other. Both the girls were thankful when the sushi arrived, on about 12 different little plates. It almost looked like House had ordered one of everything.

"There's no way I'm eating any of this stuff." Chase said as he looked at the various pieces of sushi.

"Oh grow up." House said and used his chop sticks to pick up a piece of an eel roll covered in avocado. He downed it in one bite. When he had swallowed he looked at Chase expectantly.

"This is a competition now?" Chase asked.

"Yep, if I win you cover my clinic duty for say 3 hours. You win I'll tell Foreman, seriously, that you're one of the best doctors I've ever seen, even better than him."

"Fine." Chase set his jaw, he wasn't about to be one upped in front of Tess. "This one looks like _octopus_?"

"Squid." Elise answered for him.

Chase grimaced and went to put it back but House stopped him. "No way. Put up or shut up." House egged him on.

"Fine." Chase said and put it in his mouth. He tried chewing but it just seemed to grow in his mouth, after about 20 seconds it finally went down. "Now you." he said after coughing a few times.

"Which one should I eat, oh disgusted one?" House said maliciously.

Chase scanned the table looking for the most hideous one. "That one." he said pointing at the roll with little legs poking out of it.

"Spider roll." Tess grinned, wanting Chase to win.

"Simple." Elise said to Greg. "Its only soft shell crab." Greg smiled back at her and then stuffed the roll in his mouth chewed it half up then stuck his tongue out at Chase, who squeamishly looked away.

"Delicious." he said once he had finished, and winked over at Elise.

"There's no way you're winning this, House." Chase said with renewed vigor. "I'm Australian, had grub worms for breakfast! See this…big swab of nasty green stuff? I don't even know what it is but…down the hatch."

"Oh no!" before Tess could stop him Chase stuffed a big wad of wasabi paste into his mouth. Chase looked fine for about 2 seconds before the burn of the wasabi caught up.

"Yep, I win." House said and grinned, enjoying the torture Chase was going through a little too much. The two girls began laughing too but Tess did offer him some water and patted his back.

"I think I just had a grand mal seizure." Chase said once the burn had subsided.

"But I bet it was delicious." House grinned.

"Yeah, cant wait to do it again." Chase said breathlessly.

House laughed in spite of himself, he was actually having a good time.

"So what are we doing after this?" Elise asked as she finished swallowing some white tuna.

"We could grab a burger." Chase sighed.

"I think…" a secret smile crossed Tess's face, "…mini-golf."

Elise's grin faded.

* * *

"Are we sure we want to do this?" Elise said as she and House caught up with Chase and Tess, who were already standing at the window to get their balls. "I mean 5 dollars a person… that's just highway robbery." Tess noticed Elise was doing her best to get out of this, but it served her right for laughing like that at Chase. Elise grabbed Houses hand and squeezed it looking up at him. "We could…bowl! Bowling is cheaper and you get to wear cool shoes."

"There are two flaws with that logic, for one, bowling is not cheaper than mini golf, and two…" House steeled his gaze at Chase. "He insinuated I couldn't putt, and as a doctor, I cannot let that pass." He walked up to the clerk and asked for two, motioning to Elise behind him. Upon seeing the look on the clerks face he added. "It's her birthday, we've been planning this for months…she's so excited." He grabbed the blue ball and started picking out a putter, even though they were all exactly alike.

Elise sighed, she had lost the argument, "Mini golf it is." She grabbed her red ball and faked a smile.

House stood with the score sheet in hand and began writing, "Blue, that would be the dashingly handsome medical genius. Green, the pretty yet obviously visually impaired file clerk. Red, the _very_ pretty yet manipulative salesperson…and"

"Mines the color of vomit." Chase said looking at his ball. It had once been yellow but the paint was fading to the original orangey brown beneath it.

"Vomit, the lowly subordinate with the amazing hair." he finished.

"Awh, Ill trade with you." Tess said handing Chase her green ball.

"Too late, I already wrote you down as green." House interrupted.

"It's fine." Chase said.

"Which of us goes first?" Elise asked nervously.

* * *

Elise bit her lip and tried again, and missed yet again.

"I'm starting to suspect you weren't kidding when you said you weren't any good at this." House said. Elise shot him a _told you so _look, then a _I hate you _look to Tess. "Here." Gregory sat his cane down on the nearby windmill and limped over behind her. He put his arms around her, she un-tensed in his grip. He pulled back and with a slight tap the ball went rolling down the course coming to a halt halfway between them and the hole.

"Now all you need to do is swing for her every time." Chase said, clearly annoyed House was taking the time to help someone.

"I've got this one." Elise said and walked up to where the red ball had halted. She aimed up the shot, but her mind was far elsewhere. _He was just pressed up against me, oh my god! he felt good. He's watching me now…I can not mess this up! _She swung back, and got a little too carried away. The ball shot off the course and into a nearby decorative goldfish pond.

"Well, that's certainly an improvement." Chase sarcastically remarked.

"You're kidding me." House said as he picked up his cane and his putter then went to Elise. "If you got a hole in one for the rest of the game you would still come in dead last. That means now you are demoted to caddy." he took Elise's putter and threw it over to the goldfish pond with her ball. Elise opened her mouth to say something in protest but House cut her off with a "Hold this." and handed her his cane. He leaned over his ball and popped it in.


End file.
